A LIFE OF NINJA (Taiwan, 1983)
Directed by: Lee Tso-nam
Starring: Chen Kuan-tai, Elsa Yeung, Yasuaki Kurata, Peng Kong, World Wrestling Champion Wong Kin-mi
He creeps. He skulks. He stalks. He scurries. He strikes! Ninja - most deadly foe. Using ways most nefarious and killing arts mysterious ninja will kill and kill. And kill, and kill, and kill. Sometimes he kills wrapped in gold foil like a baked potato; sometimes he is a naked lady ninja to confuse foes before blowing them up! Life of ninja is easy, no?
No. Life of ninja is hard.
Ninja must learn dancing on ice cubes. Sometime ninja ladies must mud wrestle for no good reason. How do you make a ninja? Are no ninja babies. Must take normal person and beat. Beat until are ninja! A life of ninja is shown in beautiful motion picture A LIFE OF NINJA. At heart of picture is family - they are Cheng family and have family business but no one is happy. Cheng is married to sister and is boss. Bad boss! One sister is boozer - drink lots of cognac. Ha ha! Other wants to be ninja, but can't! So she wear the tight leather trousers and beat up men with wooden sword.
Then…ninja attack! Kill with icicle! Kill with poison! Police visit Chen Kuan-tai. He is ninja-pooper: he knows ninja, but poops their parties. Police ask for help, he been in many martial art movie (like CRIPPLE AVENGERS), he must help police. He says yes. Yes, I fight ninja. He fight the ninja?!? Ninja get furious. Use hypno-mind-control killers, flying snakes, tiny bombs, poison ink, swords and knives, even get World Wrestling Champion Wong Kin-mi to wear little red briefs and turn over cars. And stomp! And kill! Big fights!
Then Chen Kuan-tai fight the head ninja, Yasuaki Kurata, in secret ninja fort. They use flying knife, exploding statue, flying backward, invisibility, giant jumping, fighting Irish jig, secret ninja spazz dance, is very strange. There can be only one. Is exciting! You must see A LIFE OF NINJA to believe A LIFE OF NINJA!